Celtic Cross after Breakup

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Celtic Cross after Breakup

Postby merrick » 05 Dec 2015, 15:00

I spent a year trying to find myself after a 6 year relationship with a surgeon ended. The man looked great on paper, and at the time I thought, "This is what I"m suppose to want, and it's about that time to get married and have children." You know, the normal societal pressures women have to face. Well we were great companions but lacked fire, and eventually last October 2014, we were both were brave enough to finally end it.

After about 11 months or so I started going on dates... Eventually, I started regularly dating a man (Leo) in October 2015. He wasn't looking for anything serious, after just getting his heart crushed from a 6-year relationship that ended three months prior. I myself wasn't really looking for anything serious either. I had been on several failed dates, and the touch and go conversations with people who were careless with follow up communication kind of drained me. I was pretty emotionally numb when I met the Leo guy.

Anyway, we dated for 2 months, and I started to feel closer to him, to develop feelings... strong feelings. He, on the other hand, was not ready. Said he considered me more as a "friend" and that I was fun to play with, have brunch... but that's it. He also revealed he had been on dates with other women and didnt know what he wanted. A polyamorous situation, an open relationship... whatever it was, it was not monogamy with me. So I quickly ended the relationship just this Wednesday, and canceled the romantic 4-day trip to Napa and Yosemite we had planned for mid-December. I was able to get a refund on lodgings as I could (thanks goodness I was still in the cancellation policy window). However, even though I was in control of the break up, I was still very hurt, so much to the point it made me physically ill and I couldn't eat for 24 hours.

I was having a hard time finding light and balance in myself (a Cancer), so after 24 hours, and ignoring his message to ask me how I was feeling the morning after the break up, I turned to my cards to ask what would be the result of my decision to break it off with the Leo man. I used a Celtic Spread, and here is how the cards laid. Any help or advice about understanding the truths in the reading as I move forward with my healing be greatly appreciated.

Thoth Deck:

Present: Princess of Wands
Challenge: 10 of Disks
Distant Past: Queen of Wands
Recent Past: Knight of Cups
Best Outcome: 6 of Wands
Immediate Future: 4 of Disks
Factors Affecting: The Tower
External Influences: 4 of Cups
Hopes and Fears: 8 of Cups
Final Outcome: Ace of Disks

Thank you for taking the time to read and ponder. Your insight is greatly appreciated.

All the best!
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Re: Celtic Cross after Breakup

Postby Aoibhegreine » 07 Dec 2015, 10:56

There is a lot of searching in this spread. That Tower tells me there are some strong held beliefs that need evicting before you can fully move on and the 6 of wands along with the 2 4's tell me you need you work on you first. We spend our entire lives with ourselves but it's the one relationship we ignore. This spread tells me that although you are upset and sad it's more your ego than anything else, your soul knows what it wants but you haven't really heard it. It's time to create your sanctuary, your sacred space and listen to your inner voice, use the tower to evict unnecessary baggage and move on.

It's hard I won't lie but it is worth it. Be you. That is all you need to do.
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Re: Celtic Cross after Breakup

Postby seedling » 07 Dec 2015, 12:32

I'm with Aiob..
Tough road, but very worthwhile!

Hugz!
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hold your own.. know your name.. Go your own way..
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Re: Celtic Cross after Breakup

Postby merrick » 07 Dec 2015, 23:59

Thanks for the interpretation! I was feeling a bit confused about the Tower. I thought i might represent my recent destroyed relationship in itself. And I'm still unsure about the 8 of cups in the hopes and fears area.

I feel like it was a positive spread over all. Like I"m on the right track, and that leaving the non committal relationship (Knight of Cups) was the right step for me.

I feel like your interpretation of the 4 of disks and the building of the sanctuary is solid. I will work on that for sure.

The ace of disks is promising, perhaps focusing on myself will lead to the the start of a new beginning.
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Re: Celtic Cross after Breakup

Postby Aoibhegreine » 08 Dec 2015, 11:01

The tower for me is about foundations, about putting down the right roots for the future you want. Being at rock bottom is the best place to start from as it opens up so many more opportunities you may never have considered otherwise.
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